It CAN Get Crazier!

Saturday at last! I can sleep in and drink my coffee sitting down. In theory.

I woke at 6:26 to a sound. Oh, no! We left the hot tub on all night. The motor always wakes me up when we do. Oh, well, at least I can enjoy my coffee before I have to take a shower, visit Dad at the hospital and go to a funeral.

Imagine my surprise when I walked into Dad's hospital room and found a strange man in the bed! And my next thought was: where is my dad? He had been taken up to the ICU. He was in distress. The pulmonologist and cardiologist were both there. The short story was that his lungs have been filling with liquid too quickly. They have been giving him lasiks and diuretics but it hasn't helped. The pulmonologist told me he'll get over this. The cardiologist told me he has less than a 50% chance of getting over this. Dad looked more like the cardiologist's description. I sent out a text to multiple recipients and started making phone calls. David showed up. He seemed pretty much in control of himself but, just to be safe, I didn't tell him what the cardiologist had said. It's tough for me when he cries. Carmi and Gail came in. There were so many of us, the nurse had to kick us out and enforce the 'two visitors' policy.

You picked me up for lunch and I left my car at Suzin's house. At lunch I told you that I think Dad is particularly distressed about his relationship to you, and I believe he really wants to see you and know that you forgive him for his pecadillos against you. You asked me what I would like you to do. I said I wanted you to talk to him, make peace with him, let him know that you forgive him. You said you really are sorry the two of you didn't like each other. I asked what you were planning on saying to him and you said, "I'm sorry you and I didn't like each other." I said that would not be okay. "What would you like me to say to him?" you asked. "I would like you to thank him for being a good father to your wife. I would like you to thank him for believing in her when she didn't even believe in herself, for supporting her through hard times, lost years, and helping her become the person she is today. If it weren't for him, I don't know where I'd be or what I would have become." And then I started to cry. Can't you see that this man, with all his shortcomings, saved me from my idiocy during my lost years? Saved me from the despair of my first marriage? Told me I could become whatever I wanted? Could learn anything I put my mind to? Listened to me whenever I needed him----including long, expensive phone calls from Ohio when he had patients waiting for him? Tell him you see the good he did, even though you and he are almost as different as two people could ever be.

I called Beth again, told her what the cardiologist had said, and asked her if she wanted to see Dad one last time. She said yes. We'd set it up, get her down here, I would let her know for sure tomorrow.

When I returned after lunch, Dad was looking much better. How amazing that such a change could take place in an hour. He was a little calmer, a little less-distressed looking. His eyes could focus a bit. We stayed another hour. I was all dressed up for the funeral with pantyhose, suit, heels. I wanted to get home and get into something more comfortable. I was taking a pass on the funeral. I asked the nurse if I could come back and spend the night on the sleeping bench in Dad's room, and she responded that they only let people do that when patients are unstable and critical, not for stabilized patients. Oh, I guess my dad is stable now. News to me.

It's pouring down rain, I'm tired, my high heels gave me a blister, and I'm not spending the night at the hospital. Dad is sort of stable, Beth is coming down anyway and she's bringing Mark, and by missing the funeral I didn't have to have another encounter with my ex. It got crazier but it's not all bad.