It's 8:30 a.m. and you have already been up and are back to sleep. On another cancer patient this behavior might look like cancer is weakening you. Cancer hasn't really changed your sleep patterns; they have always been weird. Throughout our lives you have risen at odd hours, done some usual and unusual tasks, and gone back to sleep when the rest of the world is waking from its typical, solid, uninterrupted eight. I know a lot of men have to get up once, twice, maybe three times a night, and you do too. But this is different. You get up, go out into the family room, read, check email, watch TV, meditate, and return to bed for a couple more hours of sleep. When I work, you get up, make my coffee, make my breakfast, sometimes make my lunch, see me out the door, and then return to bed. Cancer has maybe enhanced this routine by extending the time you spend in bed. Your naps are longer, you are less-likely to suffer periods of true insomnia, and your nap clusters are longer after your chemo days when fatigue occasionally colors your whole world.
Laura is here. She stayed on after Kyle returned to work, and she and I will indulge your every wish today. We talked about bike riding and having brunch out. I am excited for this day. The weather is perfect, and I am on Spring Break. Glorious, fabulous, blissful Spring Break, two weeks of freedom from rising early, running full-steam and wrangling the spectrum of five-year-old behaviors.
We celebrated with a small dinner party last night. We had initially planned another one for Saturday evening but I hadn't fully recovered from my flu, and you canceled it because you didn't like the way I was looking. I was edgy and unhappy because you had created more of a mess in the house, and that meant I was going to spend Friday evening and Saturday cleaning. You rescheduled for two weeks from now. That works for me, and my aunt and uncle will be here from Boise. It could be even better. It will definitely be better. But I have a problem with the way it went down, and I will address it later in this blog. I have already addressed it with you. Last night we had pistachio-encrusted seared ahi, garlic mashed potatoes, Mediterranean veggies, and THE butter almond cake. Suzin brought appetizers, and I had some Guggisberg cheese left from my cousin's last visit. I had originally planned on wasabi mashed potatoes, but you said wasabi is no longer agreeing with you. With only six of us, it was a relaxed, intimate evening that required no putting on of appearances. The flowers from our front walkway were stunning in the rounded vase I used. We all fit comfortably around the table. I would like to feel that relaxed at all our gatherings.
My friend from my childhood, Debbie, finished her paintings of Matt and Quincy. They were even more perfect than they had been last week. Debbie always tries to capture an animal's personality by including a favorite toy or something that illustrates what the dog likes to do. We had talked about putting in some kind of food but instead she painted them sitting in front of our house, with the irises in full-bloom going up our walkway. They are incredible! And with her artistic touch, she painted Quincy in front of the left side of the house, and Matt in front of the right side, with both portraits ending at the front door. I was deliriously happy when she brought them over yesterday! Do we frame them together, or separately? Each is 10" x 10". We gave them to you after dinner. You want them framed together; I think separately would accentuate the way the house is divided exactly in the middle. She even painted the screen door with the sunburst in it. I couldn't be happier. Finally a gift you won't return.....
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